Prof. Dr. Hürol Fışıloğlu, Founder of İlişki Pusulası Institute for Family Studies, and Retired Faculty, METU Department of Psychology, who indicated that arguing couples were shown as an example in most watched TV shows, series, said, “If a relationship is over, you need to avoid everything about that person. The most risky category is the friend category. ‘It is over, but can we stay as friends?’ Where does this need come from? It is done, it is over! Your ex does not have to be your fiend”.
‘Relationships’ was the topic at the “Step By Step Psychology” titled event co-organized by Department of Psychology, Faculty of Arts and Science, Izmir University of Economics (IUE) and IUE Psychology Club. Prof. Dr. Fışıloğlu delivered an “In Relations, is it Breaking Up? Is it Making Up? Is it Clearing Up?” titled speech at the event.
Prof. Dr. Fışıloğlu reported that couples had difficulty in “starting” and “ending” relationships. The Professor said, “A healthy relationship is formed between two healthy people. There is such a belief in relationships, ‘I make him/her feel better’. This is your partner, spouse; you are not their therapist. We are not communicating clearly. We need to be clear in relationships. The relationship needs to have a definition. Establish what the relationship is about. We cannot come up with solutions if we fail to make those definitions”.
Prof. Dr. Fışıloğlu stated that the helping process started when couples asked the question ‘I was not able to solve the problems up until now, can they be solved?’ He said that the real issue was whether people were up for solutions or not. Prof. Dr. Fışıloğlu stated the following:
“If couples fail to solve their problems, they need to seek professional help. We cannot proceed with wrong methods the daily life taught us. You are not to use jealousy as a way to understand your love. Therapists cannot do much about these situations. If you ended your relationship, you will be alone. You should learn how to live on your own.”
‘Step By Step Psychology’
On the first day of the event, Prof. Dr. Canan Başar Eroğlu delivered, “Cognitive Oscillations of Brain” titled speech, Prof. Dr. Hakan Çetinkaya delivered, “Understanding the Evolutionary Psychology”, Prof. Dr. Reşit Canbeyli delivered, “Biological Clock, A Key Brain Structure in Life and Death”, Research Assistant Turan Gündüz “Living in a Paradox: Terror Management Theory” titled speeches. IUE Polyphonic Choir, Echoir gave a concert. On the second day of the event, Asst. Prof. Burak Erdeniz delivered, “Buddhism and Theory of Mind”, Assoc. Prof. Dr. Cumhur Taş delvered, “Social Brain” titled speeches. Prof. Dr. Oğuz Tanrıdağ delivered, “Early Diagnosis of Alzheimer’s and Lifestyle Factors”, Assoc. Prof. Dr. Adil Sarıbay delivered, “Old Mind, New Mind: The Importance of Dual-Process Model for Social Cognition”, and Assoc. Prof. Dr. Emre Bora delivered, “Social Cognition in Neuropsychiatric Disorders” titled speeches.